You work out of a Hotel?
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Randomize
