yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I CAN MOONWALK!
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize