dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
