They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
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