i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
