Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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