Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
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you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
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is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
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