And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
