ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
