Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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