You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
my shit smells like andre
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
