dude i'm inner monologue high
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
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