so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
