SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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