CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
20+ Kids Who Probably Didn’t Mean To Draw Hardcore Porn
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.