Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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