The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
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