Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
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