I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize
