I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
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