its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize