yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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