Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize