This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
