Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
