do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
