Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Randomize
