wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
