Texts From Last Night

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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically

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  (703): I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically http://tfl.nu/zfwj
  Replies (27) Good night (8530) Bad night (981)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..

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  (440): you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents.. http://tfl.nu/shss
  Replies (17) Good night (719) Bad night (3991)
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  (516): View more from New York

  Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.

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  (516): Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network. http://tfl.nu/5cas
  Replies (35) Good night (3400) Bad night (937)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.

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  (314): Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest. http://tfl.nu/8ll2
  Replies (5) Good night (1243) Bad night (3093)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I spit up blood this morning

  (206): View more from Washington

  That's vegas.

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  (919): I spit up blood this morning (206): That's vegas. http://tfl.nu/44z7
  Replies (8) Good night (3913) Bad night (1626)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.

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  (302): Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one. http://tfl.nu/7sz8
  Replies (9) Good night (2414) Bad night (847)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.

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  (850): I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school. http://tfl.nu/ocap
  Replies (7) Good night (1768) Bad night (753)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever

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  (306): I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever http://tfl.nu/lhkq
  Replies (22) Good night (1507) Bad night (772)
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though

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  (601): Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though http://tfl.nu/7jbg
  Replies (25) Good night (1591) Bad night (2986)
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  (607): View more from New York

  I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.

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  (607): I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs. http://tfl.nu/nmbl
  Replies (4) Good night (1020) Bad night (453)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.

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  (517): My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now. http://tfl.nu/dik7
  Replies (1) Good night (563) Bad night (379)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??

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  (541): is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to?? http://tfl.nu/l7wp
  Replies (6) Good night (401) Bad night (612)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.

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  (215): we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels. http://tfl.nu/n1cw
  Replies (2) Good night (1184) Bad night (306)
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  (925): View more from California

  Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?

  (1-925): View more from California

  Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.

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  (925): Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer? (1-925): Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty. http://tfl.nu/4pgh
  Replies (2) Good night (486) Bad night (448)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.

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  (240): Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others. http://tfl.nu/v5nx
  Replies (0) Good night (309) Bad night (125)

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