he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
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