then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Randomize
