there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
