He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
