you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
