Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I don't think brook has ever known best
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
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