youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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