Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I wish there were birth control emojis
I didn't notice because vodka
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Randomize
