I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
