So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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