Screwed.edu
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
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