is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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