chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
