So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
