Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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