I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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