For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
