The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
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Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
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