how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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