Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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