Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
