Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Randomize
