Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
